Tattoos are no longer taboo. The millennials are crazy about them while the overall tolerance levels too have upped in recent times. This discussion is not about someone’s aversion to people with tattoos but about how we perceive heavily or amply tattooed people. Personally, I think tattoos can be very aesthetic provided they are done in the right way. Half-visible body art brings more disharmony to your persona. This is not about finding a progressive workplace that has more tattoo tolerance or expressing yourself with an attitude. You cannot change employer perceptions that quickly. If your job is about people interactions and formal meetings, you might want to try body art that remains reasonably concealed when you are dressed-up with the least possible ink-work peeping.Now that tattoos are mainstream, are there any rules to the body ink game?
Tattoos are no longer taboo. The millennials are crazy about them while the overall tolerance levels too have upped in recent times. This discussion is not about someone’s aversion to people with tattoos but about how we perceive heavily or amply tattooed people. Personally, I think tattoos can be very aesthetic provided they are done in the right way. Half-visible body art brings more disharmony to your persona. This is not about finding a progressive workplace that has more tattoo tolerance or expressing yourself with an attitude. You cannot change employer perceptions that quickly. If your job is about people interactions and formal meetings, you might want to try body art that remains reasonably concealed when you are dressed-up with the least possible ink-work peeping.Neat, designer-type bathrooms reek of elitist stature, being bathed in money?
My biggest issue is with the degree of dryness. How do these typically wet-spaces manage to stay so dry – is there no splashing or over-flowing or sprinkling that is associated with a humble, middle-class or even a luxury bathroom? I cannot recall a housekeeping guy permanently employed into cleaning-up and yet, these bathrooms tend to remain dry like parched paper! Why must I own only average bathrooms? Not sure how many people will disagree on this – there is something very progressive about having a really tidy bathroom. Not just the cleanliness part. I am talking about a well-kept bathroom with all the essential supplies in place and then, some more.
After labels and branding literature, is contemporary food subculture stooping too much towards visuals?
I have already spoken about green-washing and how food labels have been intentionally misinforming consumers, creating a polarization for their product range, smartly using nomenclature than can create visuals of greatness. If you take the time to read into what is actually on offer, the picture is often dirty, murky and very suspicious. Something similar is happening in how we, as consumers, seem to interpret food.
[Soy Milk Discussion Sans Illusions]
Colored Ensembles Look Better: Just look at all the lifestyle channels and food shows and there is this distinct fallacy being created that dishes with under-cooked, somewhat raw ingredients, and those that have a fusion of garden veggies are always healthy. If the dish happens to employ about 4-5 differently colored flavoring accessories or vegetables or herbs, the meal is immediately perceived as being damn good.
[Soy Milk Discussion Sans Illusions]
Colored Ensembles Look Better: Just look at all the lifestyle channels and food shows and there is this distinct fallacy being created that dishes with under-cooked, somewhat raw ingredients, and those that have a fusion of garden veggies are always healthy. If the dish happens to employ about 4-5 differently colored flavoring accessories or vegetables or herbs, the meal is immediately perceived as being damn good.
Sharing some of my favorite Aftertastes - Walnuts to Butterscotch
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| Walnuts & Butterscotch is Like the Perfect Marriage! |
Morgan Freeman Movie Moments that steered me to Discuss REAL Heroes
Largely, there are two three type of superhero-themed plots that are grabbing attention these days. Firstly, the typically single-hero script where one man or woman must rise to face the challenges put upon planet Earth by an evil entity. This is perhaps the most conventional choice with spider-bitten and bat-inspired cast assuming a character that is larger-than-life, always ready to stand-up for the right things in life. Secondly, the multiple-hero & multiple-stories plot. The recent past seen a lot of activity in this niche with comic book franchises coming together to recreate a bigger scale magic on the big screen. What if we have been interpreting food textures all wrong?
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| Perception of Food Textures Seems Biased, Under-cooked |
What if I tell you that you have been looking at food textures all wrong? I might be going overboard with the opinion thing but the fact is that when we speak about textures at a dining spread, it is about the food served, the surfaces are that of the ingredients, the way they have been fried, the roasted crust, the oozing sauces or the soft interiors. But no one stops to consider one more type of dining texture – within the things that are a part of the tabletop experience. From the table runner to the finishing of the eating hardware, from the type of napkins placed on the table to shine of the serving platter, everything forms a part of the bigger, cohesive picture that is your meal. Just imagine this – if you were paying the big bucks for an elite dining experience, wouldn’t it matter if the salt and pepper dispensers had a smudged, stained woody exterior? Of course it would! You are paying for the entire experience and the materials that surround your plate, are situated beneath the serve-ware or form a part of the dining accessories are included in this.
Do you desire a wall for yourself at the workplace?
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| bench-accounting-49906, Source: Unsplash |
I know this sounds strange and it wouldn’t be me if the idea was too mainstream. I have always wanted a blank, big white wall at the workplace along with the liberty of using a Polaroid camera. The idea is simple – the instantly captured images would be that of movers & shakers, sinners and superstars from the team. The wall would be ideally divided into two, vertical halves. One, a wall of shame, and the other, a wall of fame. Those who have managed to commit serious blunders and seem not to realize the gravity of their errors would be instantly clicked and on the wall of shame.
Planning can be an achievement killer: scheduling to find your chi of greatness?
Why is that people believe that all winners, i.e. people with difficult to measure financial fortunes or with enviable contributions that we value, are believed to be great planners? It is because all lifestyle gurus preach us about the power of planning? I seriously doubt that planned schedules is what made people choose and chase the most difficult tasks, work through difficult marriages, defeat periods of psychological warfare, and still live to see another day. I honestly believe that the biggest thinkers, the most talented folks we know about were geniuses who planned a lot but were spontaneous enough to try things without waiting for the perfect moment.
A Highly Uneducated view on why COFFEE is considered a LANGUAGE in its own right?
Caffeinated conversations can be as strong as the freshest brew, high on opinions and passionate rationalizing – obviously this type of social interaction is not for everyone, not everyone speaks coffee that well!
I personally believe that while many people overdose on this
stuff not all of them actually realize the gastronomic culture they are a part
of – it is an everyday legacy that is always alive and kicking. The curious-eyed
Adams in college fraternities simply crave the rush or need it for marathon,
overnight revisions leading up to the exams. High-on-caffeine decisions makers
handling key profiles and top-notch roles seem to be drinking coffee as their
daily fuel. This variety of coffee is obviously more educated. You get less
pounds for higher rates. The brew is usually an international version or some
Amazon bestseller sorts. The real doers who are like the crew of any workplace
drink coffee in a very different way. For them, it is about keeping-up the
motivation levels and using the caffeine rush to catalyze more high output
moments…the more, the better. The elderly at home might keep away coffee from
their evening and late-night excursions. Seems like they cannot handle the
elevated pulse rate but do like their brew when they need to step out into the
harsh world to get things done that they believe their thankless children
should be doing!
DIY Anxiety Management: Walking Away the Blues - Straight from a Transforming Believer
This discussion is a real-life account of trying, adapting, and keeping true to Morning Walks. No matter how humble this very familiar fitness activity seems, there is a lot to it that goes unnoticed. Hopefully, this discussion will help you understand why daily morning walks can be highly therapeutic for your physical & psychological health and help you become a better believer…
Around the first week of November 2017, I had settled into a reasonably regular schedule of morning walks. The momentum was good, the pace quick, and the steps curious to test my walking technique across different types of grounds/surfaces. These bouts of brisk walking had arisen earlier,r t, but sank abruptly. The reason was that I used to get bo, red, or being surrounded by other morning walkers seemed too suffocating. However, moving to Dwarka has been a gift in this regard. The place we live is a blend of extreme housing development and large patches of wide, empty roads that are just about perfect for walking. Yes, I don't prefer walking in massive parks, and garden trails seem too restrictive. The biggest plus was that I started walking when the winter season hadn’t even set in. This meant the luxury of wearing minimum and getting the time to ensure that my walking form was good – this aspect has been a bit of a journey for me – walking methods are comprehensively covered in health & living articles, blogged about in lifestyle or exercise-related online magazines but lack a certain degree of clarity – what type of walking is a bit exciting and highly effective?My Walking Explorations…much more than you imagine
My reason for taking on a dedicated walking schedule was simple. I needed something to keep myself distracted in the morning, some physical activity to beat the anxiety that often builds up without having the time or inclination to exercise with weights. My gymming sojourns can be parked for being discussed later – I took up walking as a means to substitute the morning weight training, saving time and energy, ensuring that I didn’t feel spent when starting the day but was challenged to the extent of keeping my ticker happier, mixing some cardio along with some me-time that didn’t allow my mind to ruminate and the thoughts to go awry. The nearly 40-day walking exploration was worth the effort. Everything in your walking gear matters. From the footwear options to the type of jacket you put on, each apparel and accessory choice makes a discernible impact...how? I am sharing this from my personal experiences:
Regularity matters
You have to take it up as a morning activity that starts the day for you. Skipping days early into a plan that is still taking shape means losing your momentum. You need to be at it for at least a month to call yourself a walker with benefits. Try not to divide the walking hours across morning, daytime, and evening – walk fast, walk early in the morning, and do it each day! Rise. Walk. Start Your Day! There are no rest days as compared to hitting the gym.
Invest in shoes
First impressions suggest that walking is not a high-impact exercise, so you don't need highly durable or supportive walking gear. This is entirely wrong. Why? Walking regularly takes a toll on your knees and hamstrings if you are doing it at the right, athletic speed. You might not have the body maneuvering guile of a pro-walker or a marathon runner, er but this physical activity tests your muscles, especially ly of your knees, ankles, and the inner thigh region. Your best preparation is investing in shoes that can absorb the shock and ensure you don't develop any chronic pains. You can even keep shoes sorted for rainy days and winter days. You can sort walking shoes in terms of those that necessitate a good pair of socks versus those that envelop the barefoot, feeling great against the skin. For me, shoes where the sole is still soft and capable of absorbing the bumps like good, semi-new tyres on a car are the best. Stay away from anything too bulky.
Embrace different surfaces
Please understand that walking coaches and fitness trainers will continue emphasizing the need for softer, slightly pliable surfaces to ensure better, faster results without harming your legs. However, once you have attained some degree of familiarity with the walking schedule, you can challenge yourself across different surfaces. Every type of walking ground out there holds a bit of body-balancing, musculature-testing challenge. Try these to keep your walking schedule more eventful and engaging – this ensures that the morning activity always allows you to do something different. Just like in the gym, you need different exercises to break the monotony – the ground on which you walk is yours to explore, and start new journeys every week!
Maneuver your body better.
Most walking enthusiasts talk about the need to understand a basic walking principle: your entire body is in motion. You cannot hang back or slouch as you try to walk faster. Your arms cannot lie idle, and your neck cannot sway on either side if you want to walk better, for more benefits. Arms are like the rudder that helps you maintain the perfect posture. Using your arms in coherence with your walking strategy is what I want people to understand better. If your arms move quickly, it will invariably push your entire body into walking faster. The pace quickens each time your arms extend more, almost parallel to each other. You don't need to have a soldier-like walking stance. Just keep the back straight, bowing ahead to the bare minimum degree as you want to press ahead, and this position fuels the momentum.
Use walking to heal, as a grieving mechanism.sm.
I have been guilty of overthinking the smallest details, observing, and opinionating about things that might seem hopelessly trivial to others. The result? Daylong anxiety creates a breeding ground for self-doubt, worrying inconsolably, and taking forever to get over broken relationships, missed career opportunities, and developing IBS – Irritable Bowel Syndrome. Walking has been largely therapeutic for me, helping me de-clutter my mind. Usually, I try to breathe slowly even as my walking footprints gather speed. This is the time when I try to banish negative thoughts that have never helped me grow personally, as a better worker, a more loving husband, or a more caring son. Walking more, beyond my stipulated time of one hour, is my go-to therapy on days I am suffering from passive anxiety attacks.
Don't mind the slowdown.s
The morning haze, a bit of early morning chill, not having a good night’s sleep, and many more, there is always a reason that, in the middle of your walking schedule, you might be facing unwanted slowdowns. There are plenty of times I felt that the overall impetus was lacking on a certain morning. However, don't fret too much. Just lower the speed, slow down, and give yourself some window to catch up. I have rhinitis, an allergy that causes serious irritation in the nasal passage and sinuses but this never kept me away from completing my daily, 1-hour walking workout – yes, for me, this is akin to doing squats or deadlifts and posting in front of the mirror!
Don't get too digital about it
There is an overwhelming push for doing everything the digital way. Speedometers or walking distance calculators, wristbands with LED displays, and activity calculators are making this look too complex. I am a technology follower too, but using it excessively means you are now extracting the fun from your walking. For me, all these devices seem redundant when my mind should be free from any distraction that makes me look at a screen. I don't want to have my leg or arms brushed against some type of contraption or pocketed/sleeved device. I want to walk in the freest manner with a good old wristwatch doing the trick.
Keep the faith!
Like most things in life, sticking to any regimen and making a good habit is hard. My challenges have been the same. While seasonal allergies, bouts of anxiety, and jangled nerves will always provide sufficient grounds to let go, you shouldn’t quit. As I step out again tomorrow morning when the world seems hidden, it is not about just burning calories – this is a tool in my arsenal to transform, to heal better, to believe more. And yes, remember that heel-first footsteps are the best without a big thumping action. Please share your story of using a very basic, everyday activity as a means to change for the better…THANK YOU!
Don't Try to Life-proof your Relationship, Let it Ride the Wave cauz You Made it that Strong!`
I haven’t chanced upon the secret to making a marriage damage-proof or insuring it against emotional setbacks. However, I do feel that the honest that we maintain, as a committed couple, positions us slightly better. Better than whom you ask? No comparisons here but I see a lot of couples, recently married ones in particular, unable to navigate the initial period that calls for wide-scale changes in perspective, during the time when you learn to create a space comfortable for each aspect of the relationship.
Uptight & Not-so-Cool, yet some women will flaunt Boho looks they don’t own
Unapologetically disheveled looks, complete with accessories inspired by artisan or crafty work and an attitude that says you are not bothered to be judged by others – this is what defines the Boho look. It is assumed that there is some hippie and very spirited about people who carry the look. However, the truth couldn’t be more twisted. I have seen plenty of women charming their way through a party with long, flowing apparels and plenty of layered accessories.
Supposedly, there is something fashionable in being precisely shambolic. These women believe that the Boho illusion uplifts them beyond others in their presence, as they have stepped beyond the realms of typical, branded fashion norms.
Most of them however fail miserably in this desperate attempt. The frowns are clearly visible, the continuing adjustments to what they are trying to carry tattles that they are trying too hard to look at-ease. Slouched in what looks like a blend of comfort-wear and minimalism, sprinkled with some athleisure-wear, most of them look confused about what they are trying to convey.
Consciously uncaring or too confident about the reality of their silhouette not showing? There is too much vagueness at play here, most of it emanating from the fact that the entire idea of the gypsy lifestyle-inspired Boho look has been lost. Pancaked faces or facial skin primed with industrially sprayed layers of make-up completes the misery and style suffers & dies…
Supposedly, there is something fashionable in being precisely shambolic. These women believe that the Boho illusion uplifts them beyond others in their presence, as they have stepped beyond the realms of typical, branded fashion norms.
Most of them however fail miserably in this desperate attempt. The frowns are clearly visible, the continuing adjustments to what they are trying to carry tattles that they are trying too hard to look at-ease. Slouched in what looks like a blend of comfort-wear and minimalism, sprinkled with some athleisure-wear, most of them look confused about what they are trying to convey.
Consciously uncaring or too confident about the reality of their silhouette not showing? There is too much vagueness at play here, most of it emanating from the fact that the entire idea of the gypsy lifestyle-inspired Boho look has been lost. Pancaked faces or facial skin primed with industrially sprayed layers of make-up completes the misery and style suffers & dies…
Some Perils of Overlistening at the Office: Why It Might Not Be Such a Great Idea!
In today's fast-paced work environment, effective communication is crucial. However, an excessive focus on listening can have its drawbacks. While active listening is an essential skill, spending too much time listening at the office can hinder productivity, increase stress levels, and hinder personal growth. This article explores the potential pitfalls of over-listening and highlights the importance of finding a balance in workplace communication.
Reduced Productivity
Excessive listening can be a productivity killer. Constantly attending meetings, conference calls, and lengthy conversations can take up a significant portion of the workday, leaving less time for actual tasks. According to a survey conducted by Harvard Business Review, professionals spend an average of 50% of their workweek in meetings, with a majority reporting that much of this time is unproductive. The more time spent listening, the less time is available for executing projects and meeting deadlines.
Increased Stress Levels
Over listening can contribute to heightened stress levels. Constantly absorbing information, opinions, and requests can be mentally exhausting, leading to burnout and decreased well-being. Research shows that prolonged exposure to excessive auditory stimulation can cause physical and psychological strain. According to a study published in the Journal of Occupational Health Psychology, employees who experienced higher levels of auditory stress reported lower job satisfaction and higher emotional exhaustion.
Impaired Decision-Making
While listening is an essential component of effective decision-making, too much listening without proper action can lead to decision paralysis. Spending excessive time gathering information and seeking others' opinions can result in analysis paralysis, where decisions are delayed or never made. Studies have shown that decision-making processes can become more efficient when individuals strike a balance between listening and taking action. Actively seeking diverse perspectives and information is crucial, but it is equally important to synthesize and act upon the information gathered.
Hindered Personal Growth
Overlistening can impede personal growth and development. While it is valuable to learn from others and seek guidance, excessive reliance on external input can limit individual creativity, autonomy, and problem-solving abilities. According to a study conducted by the University of Pennsylvania, excessive reliance on external sources for decision-making can hinder personal growth and decrease self-confidence. It is important to strike a balance between listening to others and trusting one's own judgment to foster personal and professional growth.
Striking a Balance
Finding the right balance between listening and taking action is key. Effective communication involves active listening, but it also requires knowing when to contribute, share ideas, and make decisions. By setting clear priorities, managing time effectively, and establishing boundaries, individuals can strike a balance that promotes productivity, reduces stress, and fosters personal growth.
While listening is an important skill in the workplace, over-listening can have detrimental effects on productivity, stress levels, decision-making, and personal growth. Striking a balance between listening and taking action is essential for maintaining a healthy work environment. By optimizing communication practices, setting priorities, and finding the right balance, individuals can enhance their productivity, well-being, and overall effectiveness in the workplace. Remember, effective communication involves not only listening but also taking appropriate action based on the information gathered.
Dhanak: movie for those who prefer organic expressions, a story without a push...
What is it that you expect when choosing a movie title? A great story, a plot that keeps you engaged, performances that are either realistically raw or larger-than-life – what else? What could be that one feature that you want in every movie that makes it more watchable? For me, it is about the way the story pans-out, at what rate, how fast or slow the story moves and how the smallest instances fit to create the perfect backdrop for the characters. This is exactly what Dhanak does. This is not about SRK or SK type of raw, movie-worshiping prowess. This is not your usual film festival food either. Dhanak is interestingly positioned somewhere between being a story-fueled small-budget production that could have benefited immensely with a bigger production house and a wannabe artsy movie. The final product is brilliant.
MMA type training grabs attention but you might be missing the simplicity of it…
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| MMA perception: vastly different equipment? |
It looks damn tough, doable enough if you could get the right type of trainer, and you know, for sure, that once into this type of gym routine, you will look and feel like a caged warrior! You must be having these visions when looking at those MMA training snippets. However, what people don’t understand about MMA training is that it is much less fancy than it is made out to be. For starters, this is not your typical gym routine. This is not about muscle gains only. This is another level of whole body workouts and fitness that trains even the hair strands and the follicles that grow them. What you should know about MMA exercises is that balance, 360-degree mobility, alertness, and around-the-clock ability to counter-attack & defend are more critical.
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| More Conditioning over More Muscle |
This is the same reason why some people don't like MMA why some people love MMA – what looks achievable in the beginning is soon translated into endless reps. Here, the trainer will make you bend deeper, squat lower, jump higher, and twist repeatedly unless the objective of entire-body mobility is achieved. After watching YouTube uploaded and UFC-produced MMA training clips, some people love MMA – at least this is what they think! What goes unsaid is that the fighter-level goals can be achieved only by a lifestyle transition. You need to transform your daily schedule to achieve true MMA fitness. Yes, you can use some of these exercises, but don’t go hunting for gyms that boast about the biggest names in the cage-fighting business. Unless you are planning to get serious about this lifestyle, you need to borrow some exercises and not the entire regimen. The fighter celebrity might visit the gym once a month – that does not make it a legit, real MMA training center. You don’t need the real grind, the most complex equipment that it takes to be a pro MMA fighter. You need MMA-inspired workout additions, and a seasoned gym trainer should be able to get you these without more charges, without changing your gym. The only thing would be a mentality to push yourself much, much harder…
SOME MORE WORKOUT-oriented DISCUSSIONS YOU MIGHT WANT TO EXPLORE!!
Mind Matters: That One Thing No One in Depression Should be Allowed…
I have had the depression monkey on my back, often find life stuck in first gear mode, and repeatedly come across scenarios where it would be easy to fold up under a bedsheet and just lie around for the entire day. However, my wife would not allow this, and now, I realize the basic human psychology at play here. There is one truth you cannot escape – for some reason, whatever science has to say about it notwithstanding, you might be more prone to anxiety and depression. There will be bad days, horrible days, and Jewish holocaust-like days. Will the world come together to help you get out of your slumber? No. Will family and friends make it a mission of their lives to help you live a better life? No. Will you have to figure out your own solutions and find your own resolutions to battle it out? YES! The biggest mistake you could make when finding middle ground during an ongoing bout is to let go of your daily schedule and find shelter in bed. This one pattern can bring about havoc in the form of psychological symptoms that will mar your entire lifestyle for weeks, including work and your relationships. If you happen to be with a person currently fighting these battles or happen to be one yourself with someone to trust, just ensure one ground rule is established – No Time in Bed!
The reason is easy to understand if you know that a chain reaction is like, if you understand how an assembly line.
- For starters, getting in bed on those days signifies you are not really fighting | Defeatist
- You might sleep, nap, and mope, but you will let go of your daily schedule | Messed-up
- This adds to the recovery time, meaning more time away from the good things | Fatal
- It will make you obsess about what could have been done instead | Pessimistic
- It will worsen your mood, cause it to swing hard, oscillate | Mentally Unfit
[now giving way to a more structured conversation...]
There is a particular seduction to the bed during depression that outsiders never quite understand. It is not laziness. It is not indulgence. It is gravity. The bed offers a promise that feels almost ethical: You are allowed to stop. When the mind has become a hostile workplace, and the body feels like an unreliable contractor, lying down seems less like retreat and more like triage. The world can wait. The bed does not demand coherence. It does not require you to explain yourself. But depression has a way of turning accommodations into accomplices. What begins as rest slowly becomes rehearsal—for disappearance. Not a dramatic disappearance. The quieter kind, where days pass without friction and life continues without requiring your participation. The bed, in this context, is not comfortable. It is an agreement.
Why the Bed Feels Like Mercy
Depression is exhausting in a way language fails to honor. Not the tiredness of effort, but the fatigue of existence itself. Decisions feel heavy. Standing feels negotiable. The bed, by contrast, is immediate relief. Horizontal is easier than vertical. Stillness feels like peace. There is also something deeply symbolic about the bed. It is where the day ends and begins. It holds sleep, sex, illness, intimacy, and childhood memory. To return to it during waking hours feels like returning to a pre-demand state, before the world had expectations. Depression is, at its core, a desire to be exempted from responsibility, from performance, from explanation. The bed appears to grant that exemption without paperwork.
The danger is not that the bed feels good. The danger is that it feels right.
The Psychological Shift from Rest to Residence
Rest is restorative when it has edges. When it begins and ends. Depression blurs those edges. One hour becomes a morning. A morning becomes a day. The bed stops being a place you visit and becomes a place you inhabit. This matters because the brain tracks position. Movement signals engagement. Stillness signals safety—or withdrawal. When the body remains horizontal, the nervous system receives a consistent message: threat is everywhere; remain sheltered. Over time, the mind recalibrates its expectations downward. Ambition feels inappropriate. Energy feels wasteful. The world shrinks to the dimensions of the mattress.
What feels like conserving energy is often the slow training of helplessness.
Routine Is Not a Cure, but It Is a Boundary
People recoil when routine is suggested as a response to depression. It sounds dismissive, bureaucratic, and unfeeling. As if a checklist could touch something so heavy. But routine is not medicine. It is architecture. Depression thrives in environments without structure. Not because structure fixes mood, but because it prevents mood from dictating reality entirely. When you leave the bed at a certain time—not because you feel better, but because the day exists—you create friction. Friction is uncomfortable. Friction is also proof that you are still in contact with the world. The bed removes friction. That is its greatest appeal. And its greatest risk.
The Bed as a Narrative Device
Staying in bed does something subtle to identity. It turns life into something that happens elsewhere. You are no longer doing the day; you are observing it from a horizontal distance. Messages are read but not answered. Plans are considered but not enacted. You exist in draft mode. This narrative shift is dangerous because it feels passive, not destructive. You are not making bad choices. You are simply not making any. Depression prefers this ambiguity. It does not want catastrophe; it wants quiet erasure.
The bed becomes the setting where life is indefinitely postponed.
Why the Bed Always Wins the Argument
The bed is undefeated in negotiations. It does not shout. It does not threaten. It simply waits. You tell yourself you’ll get up after one more scroll, one more thought, one more attempt at feeling ready. The bed does not rush you because it knows you are not going anywhere. In this way, the bed behaves like depression itself: patient, persuasive, strangely polite. It never says stay forever. It says stay for now. And now has a way of stretching.
Behavioral Activation, Minus the Optimism
Psychologists call the act of doing things despite low motivation “behavioral activation.” The phrase sounds sterile, almost insulting. As if willpower were a switch you forgot to flip. But stripped of jargon, the principle is brutally simple: movement precedes mood more often than mood precedes movement. This is not inspiring. It is inconvenient. It means getting out of bed without believing in the outcome. It means acting without hope. Depression hates this because it removes the condition it relies on: I’ll do it when I feel better.
The truth is harsher and kinder at once: feeling better is often a side effect, not a prerequisite.
Why Staying in Bed Feels Like Self-Care (and Isn’t)
Modern language has complicated this further. Rest is framed as resistance. Stillness is framed as healing. These ideas are not wrong—but they are easily misapplied. Rest heals when it replenishes. It harms when it replaces engagement entirely. Depression weaponizes the language of self-care. It turns compassion into permission for withdrawal. The bed becomes a moral shield: I’m being gentle with myself. Sometimes that is true. Sometimes it is the illness speaking in a voice you trust.
The difference is not always obvious from the inside.
The Body Learns What the Mind Repeats
The longer you stay in bed, the harder leaving it becomes. Not psychologically alone, but physiologically. Sleep cycles are fragmented. Appetite dulls. Muscles weaken. Circadian rhythms dissolve. The body begins to expect less from itself—and delivers accordingly. This is not failure. It is an adaptation. The body adjusts to the demands placed upon it. If the demand is minimal, capacity shrinks. The bed, in this sense, is a training ground. It teaches the body how little is required.
Reversing this does not require motivation. It requires interruption.
What Getting Out of Bed Is—and Is Not
Getting out of bed is not bravery. It is not progress. It is not recovery. It is not proof that things are improving. It is simply a refusal to let depression own the first move. You can get out of bed and still feel miserable. You can get out of bed and still hate the day. You can get out of bed and immediately wish you hadn’t. None of that invalidates the act.
Depression wants total compliance. Standing up is partial resistance.
Why This Is So Hard to Talk About
There is a cruelty in telling someone with depression to get out of bed. It feels accusatory, simplistic, and ignorant. And yet there is also cruelty in pretending the bed is harmless.
Both truths coexist. The difficulty lies in saying the second without sounding like the first.
What is often missing from the conversation is acknowledgement: the bed does help—briefly. It just charges interest.
The Quiet Cost of Another Day Horizontal
Nothing dramatic happens when you stay in bed all day. That is the problem. No alarms go off. No one intervenes. Life simply continues without you. Depression is not always loud. Sometimes it is the slow normalization of absence. The bed makes absence feel reasonable.
Final Reflection
The bed is not evil. It is not the enemy. It is simply powerful. It offers comfort without requiring a return. In depression, that offer is dangerously attractive. Getting out of bed does not cure anything. But staying in it too long teaches the mind a lesson it does not need to learn: that withdrawal is safer than participation. Sometimes the most compassionate thing you can do is not to rest, but to interrupt rest before it turns into residence. Not because the day deserves you—but because you deserve to remain in it, upright, even when nothing feels worth standing for yet.
References
- https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3181953/
- https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC5573560/
- https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3181947/
- https://www.apa.org/monitor/2015/11/behavioral-activation
- https://www.nimh.nih.gov/health/topics/depression
- https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/basics/behavioral-activation
- https://aeon.co/essays/depression-is-not-a-chemical-imbalance
Even Regular, Marathon Foods Get Boring. How to break the predictability?
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| Basic, Everyday Food Choices Should Not Get Boring |
I say this is easy. There will always be eggs and potatoes in my diet. These are bare essentials of my meals throughout the year. However, things can get a bit too predictable for your taste buds to feel excited. Think of them buds like girlfriends who want the next date to be at a different place. With regular food ingredients, this is not about changing venues. It is about juggling them better. Not asking you to attend a circus workshop but just playing around with how and how often you re-use, repeat and reconsider food essentials. This has another indirect advantage that some people don't realize. By using some replacements, natural and real ones, and some swapping, you are also most likely to cover a larger food item demographic which means consuming more and different type of nutrients. For instance, I switch from white bread to milk bread, whole wheat bread, multi-grain bread and then homemade breads to ensure that my bread-ness for the month has well-stocked nutrients in this particular category!
When Pro-Wrestling’s Surreal Undertaker Helps Grieve, Heal & Cope-up Better
I recommend this beautiful discussion that helps you understand how people learn to self-adapt & learn when life strikes them down with damaging consequences. While most children would have developed strange social habits or a self-destructive escape mechanism, the child here watches and bonds with pro-wresting broadcasts. A beautiful, short, narration of finding some way of dealing with the situation even though the solution comes as comical as it can be with eerie zombie music, smoke-filled entryway, an absolutely empty ring and the Deadman himself – the Undertaker! During my early years, I was fortunate enough not to have witnessed or gone through any tragedy of similar proportions. While the protagonist here loses his father, the less regular people, wrestlers in gimmicky tights provide the relief. This is about a grieving mechanism that manages to carry-on, now employed every week to cut away from the issues that make-up regular lives…an escape mechanism that doesn’t really hurt anyone!Catty, Animalistic or Just Fashionista? The Truth is that Animal Prints Don’t Make You Look Any of These…
Women of all ages are guilt of doing it - assuming that animal prints, particularly that hideous rip-off mimicking the cheetah or panther hide, make them look more sumptuous, boosting their aesthetics. Those dotted patterns aren’t fooling anyone. You are not wearing an exclusive apparel and if you were, wrapping yourself in a rare animal hide basically proves you are an inhuman idiot…
Everyday Observations: What is this feeling associated with Books Stacked Together?
I must be hopelessly and utterly geeky to share this but every time I watch images of books smartly packed together, I get this feeling of calmness, the visuals engage my mind and overall, I feel good!
Really don’t know the reasons for it but snapshots of massive libraries or even decadent books put together on legacy shelves give me a sense of calm, as if for a moment, Life has been put on order. Though purely academic, even university library spaces have had this effect on me. There is nothing too aesthetically progressive about it but yes, sometimes when you see those glossy covers with a wide range of colors, the scene is rather appeasing. Step closer and you can find if someone took the time to place the books in an order beyond the alphabetical rule. This can be based on increasing or decreasing book size, hardcover or not, or the binding pattern.
Spottified Science: Finding Artistic Impressions in the Most Unusual Places
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| There is art in observing artsy shapes, textures, thoughts |
Crowded, stinky, sweaty like an Asian sweatshop - these expressions come immediately to mind when commuting in heavily trafficked public transit systems like the Delhi Metro. However, there are some instances where you spot the most unusual types of artistic impressions. This is not real art. This is not typical art. There is no intentional expression here. This is about noticing something that might seem a blend of genuine shapes, textures and colors without a mind - something that is hanging out there, waiting for itself to get spotted. This is without the expectation of being rewarded - this art is purely visual, highly uncontaminated. This image is perhaps the perfect example of how I tend to look at such things. One look at the pictorial and the things that immediately come to my mind:
Updated on October 17, 2018 - talking about textures, earlier today I was watering our balcony of live plants and it seemed that some of the planters had aged and most have not aged that well. Upon closer inspection it became clear that the paint had managed to stick on to the ceramic and concrete surfaces but the daily exposure to sunlight and hard water had taken a toll. The resulting texture was crumbly and very dry. From a distance, it gave a weathered look to the planter but upon closer inspection, the texture gave way to an unusual type of syncing, some ageing plants were matched with ageing planters while the younger pots, the younger generation, was bright and sparkling. For a moment, this reminded me of how youthfulness is about brimming and shining with this energy of enthusiasm and it seemed that this fact is true across every level, across all types of surfaces, alive or dead!
- Yellow can be a great contrasting shade - not my favorite, it does stand out beautifully...sometimes
- Ring on the finger that is hanging on - is this like someone trying to hold on to a relationship?
Just a finger-level support - can save the day if you really try to hold on, really want to survive - Focus on one thing - the camera shot blurs out the surroundings, like we blur away important things when our minds our fixated on something!
- Concentric type shapes - the smooth curve triangles seem to create perfect symmetry
Why don’t I have the focus or irrational interest for marathon TV-watching sessions?
For the Apple-fed generation, this question won’t even make sense. I am talking to the millennials who were put on this Earth between 1975 and 1985. People born during this decade would understand the changing and highly disruptive dynamics of TV watching. We were brought up with a simple belief that TV was supposed to be the storehouse of entertainment. However, access to it was limited. It was routinely filtered and purged by family elders. Having free access to TV without their presence was a good omen, a sign that the Gods were happy with us. For us, Television had real potential, a promise that was unspoken, and it shared space in all of our future plans. After all, the type of TV program cart we could boast about and our TV model credentials was a direct commentary about our lifestyles. The poorer among us would fantasize about having unrestricted access to overseas programs while those who could manage it were treated like royalty.
The Geeky Gaff: Judging a Book by its Cover…Feel & a Lot More!
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| Photo by Annie Spratt on Unsplash |
Discussion about the smell of old books, the aroma within a
library or the sniff of freshly printed documents is rather common. However,
there is another thing that I have noticed, more of realized lately, in how I used
to approach books. For starters, am not your bookophile. I don’t know the
latest titles, the last round of well-recognized bestsellers and authors whom
people talk about with the pride of a successful marine explorer. However,
there have been phases when I was deep into books, collecting them, trying to
read them all. During this period, I developed a weird connection with books
that felt good when I gripped them. Essentially, this was the cover – back and
forth. For some reason, every book feels rather different. Some have these
glossy covers that create a very superficial feeling. The ones that feel better
usually have a slightly textured, less laminated exterior. I could spend hours
feeling these books, and even paid attention to the type of stitching or
binding done. There is a huge difference between state-published and privately
printed textbooks.
Type of Weird Things that Cloud My Mind when I look Serious, Attentive, Concerned
Perhaps, this is not the best thing to share. Being honest can hurt your own interests sometimes but then if I didn’t, I would be the real Me. So, here it goes – from trying to recall if I switched-off the electrical trimmer to whether I stretched properly when wrapping-up a light workout, from the poorly rendered hair color job to counting the number of pimples, from noticing the girth of your wrist to obsessing about if I consumed my daily vitamins or why my underwear has started creasing with more regularity these days…there are so many things that occupy my mind when you think I am being really attentive, actually listening to you!
Self Anointed Tea Wisdom: How much leaf do you have?
SOME Scientific studies to prove MOST antibiotics are becoming less effective? Just Ask Me!
Now, it usually takes me a 7-day course. The money could have been utilized for something more sane and urgent like feeding the hungry and providing shelter to the homeless. And all medicines, particularly the vaccinations and antibiotics, will continue to become less effective as the causative agents evolve and we weaken our environment with unplanned urban development.
As it is, antibiotics don’t guarantee remedy for every type of illness. The newest strains of viruses and bacteria are already proving too much for conventional antibiotics. Something as common as the common cold or Flu is yet to contained. Rather than patronizing antibiotics, medical researchers could invest time and energy in developing better vaccines.
When Empty Rail Tracks can Make You Wonder about the Course of Life...
There are times when the simplest things that surround us, suddenly, in the most unanticipated manner, pose a question that we realize was begging to be asked all this along but perhaps our minds were too numbed by the daily grind to hear the query or find an answer to it...
Something like this happened to me recently when I was about to board the Metro train. The tracks seemed so stoic, like pathways that wouldn't change their direction even if the Gods said so. The tracks wore their usual black shade but this time around, the intensity of the darker hues was overwhelming. Why was that everything that is layered in sober shades of grays and blacks, unlike vintage camera pics, always seemed sad, as if these colors were destined to make us melancholic. As I stared down the tracks, their eternity, the infinity of their length, a question dawned upon me - was this one of those moments when you wonder where is life taking you?
Something like this happened to me recently when I was about to board the Metro train. The tracks seemed so stoic, like pathways that wouldn't change their direction even if the Gods said so. The tracks wore their usual black shade but this time around, the intensity of the darker hues was overwhelming. Why was that everything that is layered in sober shades of grays and blacks, unlike vintage camera pics, always seemed sad, as if these colors were destined to make us melancholic. As I stared down the tracks, their eternity, the infinity of their length, a question dawned upon me - was this one of those moments when you wonder where is life taking you?
Lesnar Push-Ups: Pectoral Exploding Exercise - things I do to look BIG !!
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| Apologies for Poor Image Quality - Taking out the Floor - Two Stools |
Workplace Dynamics I Like Explained Via Two Borrowed Images
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| Corner Desk. Big Windows. Simple Furniture |
Image 1 – almost instantly likable with the big window near the work desk. This is what I have been trying for, for nearly a decade now. With front-facing windows, I would have no complaints about the space closing in on me. The closed cabins make me claustrophobic. The windows are not only huge, but they are rich with so much daylight. This is a good therapy for my naturally anxious soul, and when anxiety levels are up at work, a bit of sunlight definitely helps. Even during the summer, I find a bit of daylight contributes to better mood levels as compared to working in a cubicle that is closed like a torture chamber for lifetime convicts. Another thing – this is the corner seat. Always my favorite because I tend to sit big, with my legs spread out. Here, I wouldn’t need to worry about my elbows bumping into someone’s ribs – yes, that has really happened, and I was unintentionally not too kind to the ribs. The chairs are the best, if you ask me, about office chairs that I adore. These are more industrial, rather than all the padding and unwanted buffering that only makes it more cumbersome to maneuver seats across the working floor. These chairs are more likely to keep you upright. The back support is really good. The sleek finish keeps things simple and workable, with a big push for practicality rather than choosing chairs with an unending series of knobs and adjustment features. The table or desk provides ample countertop area – not too much or too little. You don’t want huge desks that tend to encourage people to unload their household onto their tables. I am also against desks that have big, wall-like divisions that tend to alienate employees and make some teammates huddle, leaving others out of the loop. Another thing about the corner space – if you look closely, there is some very usable sill space. These small spaces help to spread out things you might need throughout the day without the need for a drawer. You can keep them in the open without making the floor look over-cluttered.
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| Make Your Own Coffee. Latte Machines. Bean Grinders. Cafe Culture |
Image 2 – This is not an office floor shot but a great idea which, if turned into reality, could be an awesome example of how workplaces can be employee-loving without wasting money on buying pompous stuff. A self-sufficient, fully workable coffee zone where employees can tend the table, pour the cream for themselves and their mates, and remember to clean up without being told to – almost sounds too good to be real. Given that a few people would not be that good at prepping the brew, the interactions that would happen with the aim of learning the ropes would eventually contribute to better people dynamics. This setup is a bit too expensive, more retail and boutique than being utterly practical. I would want more table-tending high-raised stools. Not too many bean grinders, but one to do the daily duty would be just fine. I would love to add more interior-loving plants on the counter, in fact, across the coffee floor. Unlimited access to dairy and cream also means that employees need to exercise more self-governance to avoid excesses that can make the logistics of it all look horrible.