Prozac works but why not try the un-chemical way to feel good?

working out keeps away anxiety tension busts stressThis discussion is not about whether Prozac helps with anxiety. Yes, medicines like Prozac can help you control your anxiety levels, but here, I am discussing some DIY methods that are not equally chemical and don't require you to chase around for a prescriptionI have had issues with restoring my mental energy levels every time they get depleted over a few hectic days. Ever since I turned 25, a pattern emerged where, after a couple of days of sustained physical and psychological work, my mind would go into a caffeinated mode, unable to wind down, and as a result, my anxiety levels and the associated digestive symptoms would surface. The medicines I tried over the years to control this habit and its root cause helped to some extent, but there is a catch to using them.No matter what the pharmaceutical world says, there is a downside to every drug out there, prescription or over-the-counter. Once you get into the habit of using mood boosters, or in my case, mood-sustaining salts, there is a big chance your body and mind will stop evolving to help you navigate and manage different phases of your life, and some need you to be alert and calm. My continuous run-ins with these meds also helped me uncover some things that could boost the overall mood and energy levels. These mental health tips are not stolen from the web or blatantly rewritten to engage the search engines. This is from my cup of psychological wellness, and I am sharing some of it with you:

Take some bites: the easiest way to control anxiety on a bad day...

using food to control symptomatic anxiety
You need to boost your sugar levels, but just a bit, not to the extent that you get a sugar rush. A few bites of literally anything, spaced across one hour where you nibble and munch a lot rather than consume a heavy meal, can help. Don't gulp aerated drinks as they don't hold for much time. Try more bread, cornflakes, some ice cream, a smoothie, a shake, or a small sandwich that you keep biting into. Yes, chocolate helps, but in moderation. Nuts, roasted or with something sweet, can help too. Raisins work in some way and are also a physical energy booster. Bananas tend to make me feel sluggish, so I avoid them despite a whole lot of natural sweetness. This is not meant to cure your anxiety, and it does not help you to cure anxiety. This simple exercise can help you get over anxiety for a few hours and navigate a hectic day at the workplace when there is a distinct burden you are carrying.

Don't force sleep: slightly offbeat anxiety prevention tip

anxiety needs holistic care
Trying to route your mind towards a relaxing mode could have disastrous results. You could end up feeling more irritated and less energetic. Don't sit alone and do too many deep breaths...this generic advice does not help many people like me. You might want to lower the intensity of the lighting around you, put on some music, and start engaging your mind with videos or music you like. Trying to put yourself to sleep is often the cause of bringing about anxiety. Your mind starts to dig up answers. You start examining everything that has happened over the course of the day or even yesterday. The further you dig, the farther you are from a good night's sleep. Sometimes, this can make you overthink to the extent that a small daft of anxiety comes knocking. As a rule, don't lie down for too long just because it seems like the right time to sleep or just because someone recommended a quick nap. If you are not someone who is genuinely good at power naps, don't stress it. Don't go chasing the general rule of an 8-hour sleep cycle. Keep it simple - sleep only when you are naturally slipping into it.

Online window shopping or OTT indulgence: easy ways to control anxiety

bad mental health days
For shopping enthusiasts like me, an easy way to maintain sanity on a slightly stressed day is working on an online shopping cart. Prune the wish-listed products. Cancel items whose items have just escalated. Try to read into the current sales campaign. Save items you might need in the near future. De-link or upload more of your payment cards. Update shipping addresses or link a digital wallet that can provide some savings the next time you actually buy something. Indulge in some online product comparisons. Overall, this exercise might not lead to actually buying great products, but it occupies your mind in a way that takes the focus away from something that has been bothering you. It also takes away the need to sip beer. Making a big bowl of homemade popcorn and catching up with that OTT show that has been waiting in the watchlist is another good idea. Let the OTT zombies chew down your anxiety levels. A bit of butter on the popcorn will not make you morbidly obese, and renewing the monthly OTT subscription is still a lot cheaper than getting dependent on Valium or Prozac.

Find getting-rid-of videos: easiest tools for managing rising anxiety levels.

how does anxiety manifest
This must be the strangest advice for controlling anxiety, but sometimes, it actually works. There are a lot of videos on YouTube and Instagram where people are getting rid of some strange wart or mole, overgrown nails that challenge Shrek, or hair that has never been clipped for decades. How does this work? When you are watching this type of visual content, there is a feeling of superficial, artificial relief that kicks in as the ugliest nails are clipped off, unruly locks are shaven away, or blackheads are pulled out.This helps in unwinding in a private, aloof manner, and such content is available at all times. While I call it getting-rid-of content, it can be slightly overbearing if you are watching it for the first time. Believe me, nobody really likes watching ultra-magnified views of ingrown hair on the chin being pulled out, but when you are out of quick answers to manage anxiety, anything is worth trying. However, if you chance upon animal slaughter videos uploaded by PETA-type agencies and find the recorded killings somewhat calming, you probably need help - the idea here is not to turn sadistic.

Online & Offline Clean-up: the simplest way to distract away oncoming anxiety 

declutter to remove stress reduce anxiety
You need an instant boost of goodness, and this is closely associated with a feeling of accomplishment. You need instantly doable tasks that help you feel that way. How can you do it? Get on your smartphone or get on your knees. Dust away things that are cluttering your desk or room, and your mailbox. Kick away, dump, and delete everything that seems mundane or highly unusable. From glamorous Apps to what seems no-long-usable on the bedside table, eradicate, and kill stuff that is not serving any purpose. This keeps your mind busy, works up the body a bit, and you get a nice feeling of gaining more control. Plus, your room partner or your mom would have one less reason to scream at you - how is this a bad deal?

NOT sure-shot ways to reduce anxiety - find your own fix...

There are days when running or heavy weight-lifting, even stretching, and some burpees can bring back that feeling of being alert, a reasonably good mood, and restore energy levels to some extent. And there are days when all of the things shared above don't make any impact. Like I said, this is not swallowing a pill and slightly numbing your mind. The entire efforts here are on managing your anxiety without using prescription pills or things that can be addictive. Usually, having too much caffeine or sugar does not help. Driving around aimlessly also does not get the job done. In contrast, something as simple as sipping some form of fluids might not take away that feeling of low, but it can prevent ruining your mood. You have to try it all and find what works best for you. For instance, every time I am snacking on crispy, crumbly stuff, making all sorts of horrible eating noises, my mind seems totally distracted, as if the focus has been taken away from over-analyzing things. And in the work-from-home schedule that has been enforced upon us, anxiety can come calling in the most unusual ways. You have to find simpler, non-medicated ways of keeping up your state of mental health.

I recommend trying out:

  • Chewing your food more consciously, taking extra minutes to swallow each bite
  • Listening to music that tends to make your mind travel, even if for just a few minutes
  • If you are connected to paper & pen, try to write a bit, try to journal your feelings a bit
  • If you are addicted to blogging, write about anything - it really works [personal website]
  • Tightening the grip on a body part, almost to the point of making it numb, and then releasing 

Discussing my Coleus...the plant of Gods!

illustration of how coleus plant looks
I will be adding images to this discussion soon, but right now, my focus is on talking about the growing love for Coleus. I chanced upon this plant last year. At that time, I did not understand the difference between foliage plants and flowering plants. Soon, along with my love for the plant, a bit of knowledge also seeped in. Within a few months, I realized that the coleus family is rather high on color combinations and bright, colored leaves, but does not flower. Yes, sometimes you get some seed stalks, but these are not really pretty. This is a means to create some seeds that can be preserved for restarting the pot after the winter has ravaged it.

What is the Myntra platform fee? and why should we pay for it?

I came back to Myntra after a bit of a break, busy exploring AJIO, Amazon Fashion, and Pantaloons, and this time around, while checking out, the billing structure suggested that Myntra is charging INR 20 per order as a Platform Fee! I am not sure what was going through the minds of the financial decision-making machinery at Myntra but honestly, it just does not make a lot of sense. Just imagine this - they are charging this fee under the pretext of "...for a hassle-free app experience" which makes you want to ask the Myntra team - all along, did the entire billed amount go to the manufacturer or the seller and the app was being kept "hassle-free" via goodwill and charity? Before this Platform Fee came along, Myntra, as a retail platform, was making no money from every transaction or purchase? Most people would agree, it was. It is too obvious that Myntra has been monetized like any other online shopping app. In the digital retail space, all of us know the game of tripling or quadrupling the retail sticker price to ensure that the "unbelievable offers" that claim up to 70% discount look genuine. That remains a banal and dimwitted effort to showcase the prices with a massive cutdown and nearly every shopping space online did it while many are still doing it. Even worse is some apps charging us on the grounds of Charity contributions just to ensure that their taxation liabilities remain restricted. But in this case, if the Platform Fee is not there, Myntra people will not ensure the 'continuous improvement' of the app? This makes you wonder - WHY ARE WE BEING BOTHERED AND CHARGED ABOUT IMPROVING THE APP?

Do you need experts to tell you that it is OK to Lie?

woman looks guilty feels bad about telling a lie
We are doing it all the time, and still, we need the assurance that ethically and morally, there is nothing wrong with it. I am talking about lying spontaneously, lying on the go, and lying without giving it a second consideration. It has become imperative to our daily existence. Just the other day, I found my wife hiding on WhatsApp. I couldn't be more surprised - why would anyone try to camouflage oneself on something as free and miscellaneous as this social communication platform? Because there are some people out there, toxic thought carriers, whom you don't want to overwhelm your sense of calmness on some days, at least on days when Life already seems to be going in a tizzy. So, are there any morality calculators out there that can define when it is OK to lie? 

woman looks anxious feeling her lie was caught
Is it okay to lie sometimes? The recent spate of events is sufficient proof that I have to lie, I have to make up stories, and more often than not, it is not even for my benefit. I have to lie that I need to be excused earlier because there are things that need to be handled at home, but essentially, the conversations are so damn boring - hanging around would have only meant more of myself and less of being a good participant in social situations. I have to create weird conversational backdrops for my father every time I want to buy something new for him - being honest would mean not doing some very basic things for an aging parent.

This recent article mentions that "Lying is often socially motivated" and features opinions from experts like Christian L. Hart [a researcher in lying and deception!], and he concludes that on most occasions people don't lie for "direct gains". This is true across most social situations. The intent that brings about lying should indeed be the only parameter to judge - white lie vs dishonest lying. The latter is more of a cover-up. The former is chosen because the absolute truth would perhaps do more damage. Therefore, lying in many situations is mathematically and logically the only choice.

The Delhi Choley Bhature Scene is Changing but not for the Good!

classic bhatura is losing itself in delhi choley bhatureyThe bloggers are rampant and uncontrollable when creating videos about it, supported by the inexplicable appetite of social media content consumers, and it seems that no matter what season of the year it is, there is one equally popular food option during breakfast, lunch, and dinner timings - Choley Bhature. While every hood in the city has its own favorite, Instagram and YouTube continue to preach the top 5, 7, or 10 places to reach the holy grail of Choley Bhature, and surprisingly, people in Delhi, people from Delhi, those who grew up within the city are as curious and sometimes naive, following every bit of social content to explore a new 'Choley Bhature' destination. While this transformation set in over the last 5 to 7 years, with the post-COVID [WFH] lifestyles also contributing to the cause, the overall Choley Bhature scene in Delhi has changed, and not everything about it needs to be romanced with words, and not every change should have been welcomed.

The Dream vs Reality of Family Summer Vacations: everything is not OK when holidaying with the family!

family happy vs family fighting on vacation image
Every year, as summer rolls around, images of the idyllic family vacation fill our minds. We envision laughing children playing on a beach, happy parents sipping drinks by the pool, and memorable moments being created. The reality, however, is often quite different - and much more stressful than anticipated. I recall my childhood days when family vacations were the norm, and I failed to remember even one trip that was filled with unpleasant memories. For some reason, and shockingly, I did not come across this somewhat taboo subject for most of my early years. However, some grey hair decades later, I realized that this is a genuine and global problem, and whether you are vacationing with your kids, grandparents, in-laws, or the extended family, family trips are often the source of anxiety. The following just might help, though I am sure there is no simple cure for the issue...

The Planning Pressure

Even before the vacation starts, the stress begins with the arduous planning process. Aligning everyone's schedules to find agreeable dates is a chess game in itself. Then comes the contentious debate over destinations that try to satisfy all interests and budgets. Just getting out the door requires a heroic effort of packing, cleaning, and preparing.

What is self-compassion and it is important for you to accept your body?


self compassion female image feeling self loved
Self-compassion is a critical psychological concept that entails treating oneself with the same kindness, concern, and support one would show to a good friend. Rooted in ancient Buddhist practices, self-compassion is fundamentally about recognizing our shared human experience, which includes suffering and imperfection. Dr. Kristin Neff, a pioneering researcher in this field, defines self-compassion through three main components: self-kindness, common humanity, and mindfulness.

Components of Self-Compassion

Self-Kindness: Instead of being harshly self-critical, self-kindness involves being gentle and understanding with oneself. It means recognizing that it's okay to make mistakes and that imperfection is a part of the human experience.

Common Humanity: This aspect emphasizes the connection between oneself and others. It involves acknowledging that suffering and personal inadequacy are part of the shared human condition, rather than feeling isolated and alienated by one's imperfections.

Mindfulness: Mindfulness entails being aware of the present moment in a balanced manner. It involves neither ignoring one's pain nor being overly immersed in it, but rather observing it with a sense of clarity and balance.

sign asking what self love truly means

The Importance of Self-Compassion

Emotional Resilience

Practicing self-compassion is crucial for emotional resilience. It allows individuals to navigate through life's challenges without being overwhelmed by negative emotions. By treating oneself with kindness during difficult times, one can maintain emotional equilibrium and recover more swiftly from setbacks.

Mental Health Benefits

Self-compassion has been linked to numerous mental health benefits, including reduced levels of anxiety, depression, and stress. Individuals who practice self-compassion tend to have higher levels of emotional intelligence, which helps them manage their emotions more effectively and maintain a positive outlook on life.

Enhanced Self-Acceptance

One of the most significant benefits of self-compassion is enhanced self-acceptance. Accepting oneself means recognizing and embracing all aspects of oneself, including one's physical appearance. This acceptance is not about resignation but about acknowledging reality and treating oneself with kindness despite perceived flaws.

Role of Self-Compassion in Body Acceptance

Self-compassion plays a pivotal role in body acceptance. In a society that often promotes unrealistic body standards, many individuals struggle with body image issues. By cultivating self-compassion, individuals can develop a healthier and more accepting relationship with their bodies.

painting compassionate girl indulges self love
Challenging Unrealistic Standards

Self-compassion encourages individuals to challenge unrealistic body standards and to understand that beauty and worth are not determined by physical appearance. This shift in perspective is crucial for developing a positive body image and self-acceptance.

Promoting Physical and Mental Well-being

Accepting one's body is not only important for mental well-being but also for physical health. Individuals who accept their bodies are more likely to engage in healthy behaviors, such as balanced eating and regular physical activity, rather than resorting to extreme diets or harmful practices.

Strategies to Cultivate Self-Compassion and Body Acceptance

Mindful Self-Reflection: Engaging in mindful self-reflection can help individuals become more aware of their thoughts and feelings about their bodies. This practice involves observing one's thoughts without judgment and recognizing negative patterns that may hinder self-acceptance.

Positive Affirmations: Using positive affirmations can reinforce self-compassion and body acceptance. Affirmations such as "I am worthy of love and respect" and "My body is strong and capable" can help counteract negative self-talk and foster a positive self-image.

self kindness image highlighting compassion

Self-Compassion Exercises: Incorporating self-compassion exercises into daily routines can significantly enhance one's ability to accept and appreciate their body. Exercises such as writing a compassionate letter to oneself, practicing loving-kindness meditation, and keeping a self-compassion journal can be highly effective.

Seeking Support: Building a support network of friends, family, or a therapist can provide the encouragement and validation needed to maintain self-compassion and body acceptance. Sharing experiences and receiving feedback can reinforce positive changes and provide additional perspectives.

Self-compassion is an invaluable tool for fostering emotional resilience, improving mental health, and enhancing self-acceptance. By integrating self-compassion into our lives, we can challenge unrealistic body standards and cultivate a healthier, more accepting relationship with our bodies. Accepting our bodies as they are allows us to live more fully and authentically, free from the constraints of societal pressures.

You might want to know:

Dr. Kristin Neff did pioneering work in helping us understand self-compassion. She is widely recognized as one of the leading researchers in this field and has developed a comprehensive framework for understanding and practicing self-compassion. Her work includes defining the three main components of self-compassion: self-kindness, common humanity, and mindfulness. Dr. Neff's research has significantly contributed to the field of psychology, highlighting the importance of self-compassion for emotional resilience and mental well-being. The book "Self-Compassion: The Proven Power of Being Kind to Yourself" by Dr. Kristin Neff is widely regarded as one of the best resources for understanding self-compassion. In this book, Dr. Neff explains the concept of self-compassion, its benefits, and practical strategies for cultivating it in everyday life. The book combines scientific research with personal anecdotes and exercises, making it a comprehensive and accessible guide for anyone looking to improve their self-compassion...

Woman expression displays self love body image

How is compassion different from self-compassion?

Compassion and self-compassion share a common foundation in recognizing suffering and responding with kindness, but they are directed toward different recipients. Compassion involves recognizing the suffering of others and feeling motivated to alleviate it. It is an outward-focused emotion that drives us to extend care, empathy, and understanding toward others in distress. Compassion encourages actions that support and help others, fostering a sense of connection and community. Self-compassion, on the other hand, is the application of these same principles towards oneself. It entails recognizing one's own suffering and responding with the same kindness and understanding one would offer to a friend or loved one. 

In essence, while compassion is directed towards others, self-compassion is an inward-directed attitude that involves treating oneself with the same care and concern one would offer to others. Both are essential for fostering emotional well-being and building healthy relationships with oneself and the world. Incorporating more self-compassion into your daily life can significantly improve your well-being and emotional resilience. Here are ten easy ways to practice self-compassion every day:

1. Practice Mindful Breathing

Take a few moments each day to focus on your breath. This helps anchor you in the present moment and fosters a calm, non-judgmental awareness of your thoughts and feelings.

2. Use Positive Affirmations

Start your day with positive affirmations. Phrases like "I am worthy of love and respect" or "I am doing my best" can set a compassionate tone for the day.

3. Keep a Self-Compassion Journal

Write down moments of self-doubt or criticism and respond to them with kind, understanding words, as if you were comforting a friend. Reflect on these entries regularly to see your growth.

4. Engage in Loving-Kindness Meditation

Spend a few minutes each day sending loving-kindness to yourself and others. This meditation involves repeating phrases like "May I be happy, may I be healthy, may I be safe" and extending these wishes to others.

5. Treat Yourself as You Would a Friend

lady asking what is self compassion how to practice it
When facing a difficult situation, ask yourself what you would say to a friend in the same position. Then, offer that same advice and comfort to yourself.

6. Set Healthy Boundaries

Recognize your limits and set boundaries that protect your time and energy. This act of self-respect is a key component of self-compassion.

7. Take Care of Your Body

Engage in regular physical activity, eat nutritious foods, and get enough rest. Treating your body with care is an essential part of self-compassion.

8. Allow Yourself to Feel

Acknowledge and accept your emotions without judgment. Permit yourself to feel sadness, anger, or frustration without pushing these emotions away or criticizing yourself for having them.

9. Practice Gratitude

Regularly reflect on things you are grateful for, including aspects of yourself. This helps shift focus from self-criticism to appreciation and positive acknowledgment.

10. Seek Support When Needed

Don't hesitate to reach out to friends, family, or a therapist when you need support. Recognizing when you need help and seeking it out is a powerful act of self-compassion.

By integrating these practices into your daily routine, you can cultivate a more compassionate and accepting relationship with yourself, enhancing your overall well-being and emotional health.

Overcoming Barriers to Self-Compassion

Recognizing Negative Self-Talk: Identify and challenge negative thoughts that prevent you from being kind to yourself. Replace them with more compassionate ones.

Setting Realistic Goals: Set achievable goals that consider your well-being and don’t overextend yourself. Understand that it’s okay not to be perfect.

The Role of Self-Compassion in Mental Health

  • Stress Reduction: Self-compassion helps reduce stress by allowing you to step back and take breaks when needed, rather than pushing through exhaustion.
  • Anxiety Management: By fostering a kinder inner dialogue, self-compassion can alleviate feelings of anxiety and promote a more balanced perspective.
  • Depression Mitigation: Practicing self-compassion can help mitigate symptoms of depression by reducing self-criticism and increasing feelings of connectedness and self-worth.
  • Self-Compassion in the Workplace: Workplaces that encourage self-compassion see employees taking breaks without guilt, leading to higher productivity and job satisfaction.

lady reflects on self body image needs self love
Understanding the connection between self-compassion and giving yourself a break is crucial for long-term well-being. By embracing self-compassion, you give yourself permission to rest, recharge, and ultimately lead a healthier, more balanced life. Creating a culture that values self-care and compassion can significantly improve overall workplace morale and employee well-being. When you practice self-compassion, it improves your personal relationships by allowing you to be more empathetic and understanding towards others. Self-compassionate individuals tend to communicate more effectively and empathetically, fostering healthier and more supportive relationships. Practicing self-compassion leads to sustained mental and physical well-being, helping you navigate life's challenges with greater ease. Self-compassion enhances resilience by allowing you to recover from setbacks more quickly and with less emotional turmoil.



For the sciency folks: this link contains some researched information by the National Library of Medicine, providing deeper, intellectual insight about the subject. For those who want to give it a real try, try this link - the information here by Positivepsychology.com provides some handy exercises and activities to do to kickstart your journey toward loving yourself and becoming more compassionate toward your own mind and body. For those who believe that self-appreciation should be a part of self-love and self-compassion, try this link that talks about the easiest daily-life habits that can make you more appreciative of what you do, helping you navigate the tougher days in your personal and professional life...

Eric on Netflix India is Daringly Different, Dark & Recreating Benchmarks

Benedict Cumberbatch Blue Monster Eric
When Benedict Cumberbatch said that dressing up as a giant blue monster is "one of the most ludicrous things I've done" for the Netflix show, Eric, he must have forgotten to mention that he perhaps knew all along that this is one of the biggest performances that showcases his versatility as a performer.

[Image source:
https://www.bbc.com/news/entertainment]

You will surely relate with Eric if your childhood was in the shadows of the mayhem associated with dysfunctional marriages. If your parents quarreled a lot, and as a result, you still carry many emotional scars of growing up through the years with a type of fear that cannot be explained and that unsettling feeling continues to be there, deep in your heart, even if your parents have departed, you will instantly relate with the child who is perhaps, just running away from himself. It is that feeling does not go away - it lasts for a lifetime and Eric uses the darkness of this reality to beautifully conjure a scenario as a part of its storytelling. The depths of it include the corruption in NYPD, it highlights the corruption in our minds, and how choosing to be a different individual often causes our world to be shaken, stirred, and almost decimated.